- Pain in places I didn't know existed:
Before I was 23 weeks pregnant, I didn't know what a Symphysis Pubis was, or why there would be a disorder named after it. But let me tell you, SPD is no joke. Turning over in bed - agony. Getting out of bed without moans of pain - not gonna happen. Forgetting about it for a second and using my foot to try to squeeze a giant bag of cat food into the bottom cupboard - shooting pangs of pain. The reason I was even thinking to use my foot in the first place is because bending over hurts so damn much. And, oh yeah, round ligament pain, where the tendons holding your uterus stretch out to accommodate your growing belly. It wakes you up in the middle of the night as you're changing position - suddenly just these shooting aches where you're convinced that if you actually continue with the changing of the positions that you'll tear something. And if you roll back to the original position you were in, you'll tear something there, too. So either way you're f*cked.
- Being unable to exercise:
This is one hell of a vicious circle. It starts with the pain that makes it difficult to exercise, or do anything besides lay on the couch, very still, and try not to move too much. This sitting still does not do much to keep one in any kind of shape. Add to that the fact that your belly is getting bigger, so that when you do finally get a chance to do something physical, it's so much harder than it was before. Not only are you more out of shape, but your belly is bigger, and you weigh more. So then exercise becomes more difficult and painful, and eventually your pain comes back, which leads to the still-sitting on the couch again. And so the cycle continues, until you become a complete whale. Seriously, I can't WAIT to start walking around the lake again without this pain. Me and Hannah'll be going around together, breathing in the crisp fall air, Mama getting back into some semblance of shape again. I am seriously excited for this day to come.
- Needles around me ALL the Freaking Time:
I hate needles. I hate them. I hate stabbing pain. I could never have shot up heroine. I'd faint first. Hell, I fainted the first time I got my eyebrows waxed (true story). And it seems like every freaking time I go to the doctor's, I pee in a cup, and then I either get blood drawn, or I get a shot. Vials and vials of blood. Shots galore. I seriously hate this shit.
- Not being able to sleep on my stomach:
Because there's a bowling ball in there.
- Not being able to sleep on my back:
Because the pressure cuts off your blood supply
- Not being able to sleep in any position but your side:
I can't WAIT to lay on my belly again. Like, for real.
- Hormones:
Crying at sentimental TV commercials. Crying at audiobooks about Shakespeare. Crying at Jason Mraz songs. Crying when you drop something on the floor (because it will mean bending over to pick it up). Crying because taking baths isn't comfortable any longer. Crying because you can't reach to shave your legs easily anymore. Crying because you feel like a beached whale. Crying because you're happy thinking about how great fall will be this year with a baby. Crying thinking about putting together a nursery. Crying at how cute the cats are. Crying opening up the package of cloth diapers that arrived. Crying Crying Crying. I am so freaking sick of crying.
- Food cravings:
I. Want. French. Toast. Now.
With a side of sauerkraut.
And chocolate milk.
Now.
Seriously.
- Heartburn:
I am going through Tums like there's no tomorrow.
- Carpal Tunnel:
Yeah, so apparently getting carpal tunnel during pregnancy is really common. Something about how your blood flow changes. Fortunately I can type all right. It's writing with a pen on paper that kills me. When I do my Artists Way Morning Pages each day I need to stop every few sentences to shake out my hand. I was writing thank you notes for my shower gifts this weekend, and couldn't do more than three at a time because of the pain. Really not fun.
Other more Minor Whinges:
- the constant peeing.
- the insomnia.
- the peeing mixed with insomnia.
- Carpal Tunnel:
Yeah, so apparently getting carpal tunnel during pregnancy is really common. Something about how your blood flow changes. Fortunately I can type all right. It's writing with a pen on paper that kills me. When I do my Artists Way Morning Pages each day I need to stop every few sentences to shake out my hand. I was writing thank you notes for my shower gifts this weekend, and couldn't do more than three at a time because of the pain. Really not fun.
Other more Minor Whinges:
- the constant peeing.
- the insomnia.
- the peeing mixed with insomnia.
So there you go. My whinging about the things that suck about pregnancy. Just to even things out, and show that I'm not completely immune to the miracle of the circle of life, I shall write my next post on the things I love about being pregnant. But I had to start negative. It's the mood I'm in.
(and a final disclaimer - none of this should be taken as me wishing I wasn't pregnant. We worked too hard to get so close to getting our Hannahbear. I wouldn't change it for the world. But man, I'm ready for August.)
